The most daunting task in life is not working towards change. Instead, it is the ability to fully embrace the change God is continually doing in and through you.
It seems to me that God loves making Himself known more in the “question marks” of our lives rather than in our “exclamation” moments. Such was the case for me as I found myself at a complete stranger’s house in Missouri at a retreat a few years ago. Just prior to arriving at the retreat, I was in the hospital recovering from a stroke. Doctors believe it was stress induced as we were losing our home, I had recently given birth to our third child and nobody in our family had a steady source of income.
Stress? What stress?
I was working hard for change and instead, I found myself literally stressed-out.
I was in my 30’s. This was not what I had signed up for.
Using a cane for additional support, I entered into the retreat home completely afraid yet deeply wanting change. I was carrying so much emotional pain, I couldn’t see past it. There was a flicker of hope inside of me that guided me here with others that wanted change as well. Little did I know they were just as unsure about all of this as I was.
But God moved.
As our group as a whole shared how God was stirring in our midst, we gathered around a cross to celebrate the newness in life that we had found in Christ. Friends around me that were strangers just days ago, sat in a semi-circle as we all focused on the cross before us. It was at that moment, God helped me rise from my seat and I found myself curled into a tight ball under the cross.
I could care less who was watching or what others were thinking. I was completely attached to what God was doing and what He was saying to the deepest parts of my heart.
I felt God challenge me to lay back, arms stretched out under the cross. I froze. This felt too hard. Too revealing. Too open. Too insecure. But my Spirit continued to stir. Slowly I loosened the tight grip I had on my knees and lowered my back to the carpeted floor. Keeping my eyes on the cross, I allowed my tightly latched arms to slowly leave my side.
I felt completely exposed and fully free all at the same time.
As a smile came over my face, I felt God say something new to my heart – a statement He has shared with me often over these past few years. These words have allowed me to travel through changes in motherhood, changes in employment, changes in health and changes as a whole.
As God held me close that day, He allowed me to lean in as He said, “Bethany, I love you kiddo. I’ve got you and I’m never going to let you go.”
It was the first time I had ever received the Truth that I was His “kiddo.” That word is sacred in my life.
Bethany, you are My beloved and you will dwell in safety by Me; and I will cover you all the day long, and you will dwell between My shoulders. (Deuteronomy 33:12 KJVA)
[bctt tweet=”It seems that God loves making Himself known more in the question marks of our lives rather than in our exclamation moments.” username=”CrystalTwaddell”]
I had to hit bottom in order to really receive the change God wanted to bring into my life.
It wasn’t a fun place to be. It wasn’t a quick journey by any means. Since this time, I’ve ventured through many more dark places with my kids, through marriage, through ministry changes and even health struggles. But in each difficult journey, God began to work on my heart first, instead of changing my outward circumstances.
I’ve learned that I am never alone, even if it may feel that way.
I’ve learned how to recognize His voice and continually rely on Him to hold me each and every day.
I’ve learned that it is possible to live authentically, vulnerably and open as long as you know Who holds your heart.
I’ve learned to quit fighting change and simply receive with open arms what God wants to speak to my heart.
Catch Up On Previous Made for Brave Stories…Here
Sisters, we are called to walk the way of hope instead of the way of defeat. We must claim more than our title of “Daughter of the King.” We must step up and also claim our position.
And we must claim these together. As a sisterhood; a sisterhood of brave women who stand strong in the promises of who God is and who we are.
- We all are Made for Brave.
- We are made to live for something authentic and brave.
- In living brave, we silence the past, transform the future, and take a front row seat to God’s wild and uncontainable love!
So, I’m inviting you to join this Made for Brave Sisterhood, each Monday as we share our stories and allow God to bring hope and healing. Let’s commit to being authentic and brave, one step at a time, side by side, holding each other up and nudging each other toward our true selves. And let’s claim the victory waiting on the other side of brave; for ourselves and our sisterhood.
Let’s celebrate our tears and our struggles as we peel away the layers of fear to reveal the beauty of brave.
Let’s risk everything that brave requires for everything that brave has to offer…
Becoming who we were created to be!
[bctt tweet=”In living brave, we silence the past, transform the future, and take a front row seat to God’s wild and uncontainable love! #MadeforBrave #Hope” username=”CrystalTwaddell”]
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